I have come a long way since my separation.
I found someone special to me. I count, I am not a slave to my sin and the lie of lies. I saw the Truth, as they say, “The Truth shall set you free.” I take life a day at a time, and I am ready for significant changes.
I miss my children something awful, and I have no trust in him, he admitted that he did not want everything he got. He told me for years this was going to happen. I have had four surgeries, three c-sections and nine-inch cut across my gut, gallbladder four months after my Son was born, five months after surgery pregnant again.
He made significant statements and enticed me a few times
and then turned around many years later and told me, “he deliberately lured me in on purpose.” He tried every lie in his books, to drive me crazy, admits that also. Then has the need, to ask me, “how I got through it,” all I could say was, “I never gave you my heart.”
I weighed every pro and con and ultimately abandoned my life
Because my life was one big lie. Except for my children. I could not do anything. I needed restoration, major reconstruction. I put up and masked out the truth. I weighed all the circumstances, and I could not handle anything, life was entirely out of control. I tried to work when I was a mess; I knew I needed to recharge.
The only thing I could do was to let go and let God,
Do His work. I had to go through a lot of healing, a lot of studying, learning. I had to let go of all the misconceptions, the reasons I went through my life that way. Mind games suck. It is weird how I was freed entirely when I should have been six feet under. I was dead inside; I completed turning the other cheek, seventy times seven plus. I had to do my penance.
I am the only one that could write, “In Presence of Spirit.”
I had to live in conjunction with their pain and to put an end to the generational abuse that was passed down from generations. God was with me, even though I could not find him.
Somethings I write you might not have an understanding for and I might sound presumptuous, forgive me. I put up with a lot of sickness, mind games, lies, constant crap. I had three assault charges on him; I was not functioning right, when I left, I knew I was not going back.
His lie was a curse and a blessing
Even though I lost everything. I found Christ within me, and my love and worthiness are in Christ Jesus. I am free to love with all that I have, and it is formed in truth. I am not a disgrace in God’s Eye; I tested positive. I fought for the truth and I followed the way out of the fire of Hell. I am not unworthy of happiness, and I have gotten stronger. March 11, 1997, Wendy Yvette Greenwell
February 19, 2018, I left these out… I have to deal with it, so many women are suffering. Tomorrow is the 22nd Anniversary of my Divorce, and this year 2018 is 22 Years since I started writing in January 1996. I am going to Celebrate by going Social. “ha I did not.” I have my plugins already installed.
This is “In Presence of Spirit’s” 30th Anniversary Year. To be clear my first writing, In Spirit with The Lord. Even though I have loads of work to do on the archives and pages, the writings I have Published 86 this year, are ready.
So I found forgiveness when I was given the choice in The Book “A Course in Miracles,” I picked him to forgive. It helped so much, then later the 2005 Writings. They are an intricate part of my sharing my writings with anyone who might find them one day. By sharing with him so I thought, I was sharing with the World already.
In actuality the writings of “Reflections of In Presence of Spirit,” were’ not really inter-personal in the physical, they were all spiritual for anyone who is looking to forgive someone. Oh, my this says so much. I have to Publish it. This was written to a person, I never sent it. I mean I have Published so many, this one is different. I have not seen it for many years. I am going to Publish it now. Wendy
© 1997-2022 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell