Tag Archives: personal

1996

BACK IN THE BIBLE

I am back in the Bible.

Instant Photo
It is easy reading when you have an understanding.

I have been reading, writing vocabulary, and writing scriptures. I cannot sing right now. I am not going to give up on getting a job.

    You know I needed to be with my twin. For many years I was hurt, she was not with me back in the day, she hid out so to speak. Anyway, I have overcome a lot of things from the past. Boy, my twin and I are  Twins. I feel safe with her; I wait for her, miss her. God did Bless me with a Twin. Growing up we always had each other period. So I was not ever a people person.

When you are a kid time is so slow,

    It feels, then, fifteen years have gone by Nineteen years she has lived in San Antonio and me in the Valley. I have been here since February 10, 1996, my thirty-sixth birthday. I have been gone since December 29, 1995. I left. I had to for the kids; they refused to go to the shelter with me. I had no other choice.

    This scripture is why I know it was and is right that I left. Malachi 4:6 “And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the earth with a curse.”

It is easy reading when you have an understanding.

    As it is written, “as it is unto this day,” in many of the verses in the Bible. Writings pertain to the past, the present, the future.

The fascinating, powerful scriptures are Romans:

    The whole Epistle. That is the one which should be read through in Church. The Gift is there in totality. If everyone read the Romans, they would have more understanding. Everything pertains, and we all have to find the Christ within.

    I like reading the Bible, and when I come to a word Supplications entreat earnestly address in prayer. Daniel 9:23 “beginning of thy supplications the commandment came forth, and I come to show thee, for thou art greatly beloved; therefore understand the matter, and consider the vision.”

This is fun for me.

    The Thesaurus of these words is incredible, so many words mean the same thing, all meaning in one word from God. I do freak out sometimes when we are on the expressway there are so many people, and how many are searching? How many are afflicted by abuse? How many? I try to see my part of society, and I withdraw. I lost fifteen years, and I am judged. I have some obstacles to jump over but, at least I am going forward. I am getting stronger, further from the past.

I have no idea what tomorrow is going to bring.

    I do not know where I stand with my pre-teens. It has been a month since I have seen them. I have no plans to go down there, even if I wanted to it would be on someone else’s wallet, car time, so when I can do it myself, and when I am ready I will go, I might be being stingy, I am still affected by my loss, and I need more time.

    I have accepted all of it because it was my choice in leaving, it is just a shame that I fell and lies prevailed. It is a shame. It is like I am dead. What is there to be here for but I am destined not to die to until He is ready to take me. I am probably depressing you sorry.

    I am working on working I will overcome this sooner or later will see what time brings. I hope something good. This is the pits. May 14, 1996, Wendy Yvette Greenwell

     Now why would I Publish my writings like this. My conversations, with my guardian angel. This one is a letter to her. It belongs with all the rest, no matter how uncomfortable I am at times. Wendy

© 1996-2023 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell

2007

STAND STILL

In Jesus Christ name I pray,

Moon without a flash
Holy Spirit of You Jesus Christ, help me, guide me, direct me to where You want me to start working on the writings again

Jesus, I do not know what to do. I am at a standstill, and I am having a lot of eye pain, migraines,  “that were not migraines at all.”

Oh, Jesus where is my passion?

    Where is my focus? Where is my love? My life? My understanding? I am missing You, Oh Lord in Your Holy Spirit, I am calling out Lord Jesus Christ my Lord, my life, my only reason for living still.

I want to feel Your Presence.

    I want to feel Your soft touch. I want to hear Your still small voice saying, “Complete Wendy what I have given you to do. Finish “In Presence of Spirit in Conversations with the Lord.” 

I believe with all my heart

    You are the Author through Your Holy Spirit with me and guided me even if sometimes I think I am alone. My Lord, My Savior, My Holy Father, My Husband, My Friend, My Companion, My Master of Creation, My Jesus Christ through Your Holy Spirit, I need to hear from You. April 23, 2007

Dear Lord in Your Name I do Pray.

    Thank You, Jesus Christ, for this day help me, and everyone in all Your Ways. Bless The World with Your Salvation, Your Love Throughout All Ages.

Help me Lord do Your Will.

Holy Spirit of You Jesus Christ, help me, guide me, direct me to where You want me to start working on the writings again. I so desire to get closer to You. To hear You, when You speak, to be lit up with the joy of Your Everlasting Breath.

    Bless me to understanding Your Words through the scriptures and whatever books, I need to read on getting closer to You. Thank You, Jesus Christ, Thank You Holy Spirit of Jesus Christ. April 21, 2007, Wendy Yvette Greenwell

© 2007-2023 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell

 

1996

WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN

May 29, 1996,

Moon and Trees
The Moon through the Trees in the front yard
Twenty-four hours Lord help me in your graces the day and night through

the day before what would have been our fifteenth anniversary he has married again on May 18, 1996, a few months after the divorce. I did not know at this time he was already married.

    In Jesus name, Lord, we are going into tomorrow, twenty-four hours. Lord help me in your graces the day, and night through. Let my work be with You.

    For in the World, as is, there are memories of the marriage that could have rectified in working through Christ but was not forgiven, for a purpose.

    Lord if he chooses to marry her I wish them no guile for I am with You in Truth, deceit, UN-trust, do not become me.

    God’s way is truth direction, for I was lost without You, and now I am found. For my Love is in You, through You, round about you. You are the only truth that is Omnipresent, yesterday, today, and forever.

    Lord, please guide our children, let them know I am working on me with You, and it is hopefully Your Will for me to be with our children again. “Your will be done.” When it is Your Time Lord.

    Thank You, Lord Jesus Christ, in Your Ever Present Blood. “In Jesus We Trust.” May 29, 1996, Wendy Yvette Greenwell

© 1996-2023 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell

1996

I HAVE REGRESSED

I have regressed a bit, but I am in reality.

Shadow on My Trees
My fantasy only saved me when everything was crashing down

It was a tough week, previous. I need to strive totally for my independence, and I am satisfied with all the Divorce, for now, later it will be a completely different story.

 

All the years were a struggle.

    I am not happy with what I put up with, the way I reacted to him, the way the children were’ in the middle of our hatred. It should not have happened. I cannot blame anyone but myself, for being so vulnerable to lies, deceit, confusion, rudeness, unfaithfulness.

My fantasy only saved me when everything was crashing down

And my husband then was suffering from his sufferings, and he was not able to talk about it. There is a big difference between honesty and deceit. I do not hate him; I do not love him either. I would rather be by myself then to subject myself to another man’s rules and regulations, his power, and control, to put down my existence. I feel like I am twelve what regression. It is not easy, but I know significant changes are going to be happening.

I do love, it here in San Antonio,

I was tired of The Valley to many memories. Not good at forgetting all my trauma’s right now. I know there are worse things that could have happened. I am such an outcast, not a people person, my esteem I have zero, I have to pick myself up.

How could I be so coy,

Oh God, I have let myself suffer so much, and I could not do anything about the outcome. I always wanted him to be more of a part of the children’s life. I will never feel sorry for her or be happy for her, I have given her to much emotion, and she has my family.

    I lost my husband because of her and his not being able to forgive himself for the awful years he was so cruel to me. He wanted to do it right, it to me is not fair, but I do hope he gets there even if it is with her.

    He said it took six years to get over me holding a grudge because I told him I had a crush on my third pregnancy Dr. who I had confided all that I had succumbed to all the abuse, those six years most important part of our children growing up. He was cruel and suave, neglected everything except his career, I had no other choice than to put up, and this is what I got. It is going to get better, and at this point, it is all I can handle.

It is Sunday, I read the Bible, and I feel some relief.

This has been a hard week also. Important crucial to the addicted person state and confusion and or being addicted to the addicted person. April 22, 1996, Wendy Yvette Greenwell

    March 12, 2018, My Dad wants us, my twin and I do see him today. He is 85 now, and he has some issues going on that he is worried about. We are an hour and a half away from where he lives. My sister fell and hurt herself on the rib cage, so I am driving. It has been some time since I have driven to the Arroyo.

Her husband is staying with Richard and my dog and their dog that is 18 blind and can not hear, it is so sad, but she is still trucking around.

    I know I am going back to 1996, it is all meant to go together. So it does not matter what year I pick on. I am on a roll. This is the 50th day that I have Published, and I feel I need to continue. No matter how uncomfortable I am at times.

   The first six months was cleaning out the cobwebs so to speak. So with all of this, I am going to keep this on here, and Publish. The Picture is dark, but I do not care. It is Fabulous, I have never taken a picture of my trees with a shadow before, so it is exceptional. Take care; God Bless The World and Everyone On It. Are you ready, I can not believe myself sometimes. I have to Publish it. February 9, 2019, Wendy

© 1996-2023 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell

1996

WRITING IS PERSONABLE

Thank you for helping me through the hardest time of my life.

Moon Photo
Thank you for helping through the hardest time of my life

Writing is just much more personable. I am a little impatient.

I have been writing a lot, knowledge of the understanding of the Bible. I am thankful for my twin the anger I once had is gone from God. He fixes what needs to be fixed.

    In The Bible, we need to read it in the present tense. You are a master involved in so many outlets helping people with knowledge.

    The understanding of different aspects of the whole realm of your studies in your discipleship. I hope with the studying of the Books of The Bible that one day I will be able to give at least a fourth of what you have provided in your lifetime. I look like a failure at marriage and children in life ha!

    But now tense I am where God wants me to be. I am growing inward which will be more fruitful tomorrow.

    A lifetime of negative has to replace itself with the truth of our existence. There has to be more, and there is. I will get passed this and hopefully be able to push my way out into the World. May 29, 1996

    March 11, 2018, To my 72-year-old friend, guardian angel, I used to call her. I am second guessing myself. Should I, Could I, Would I, Shall I, Yes I think I will. February 9, 2019, Wendy

© 1996-2023 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell