Tag Archives: forgiveness

1996

SLUSHY MUCK

I have been reading a lot, and understanding

Night Photo in the rain
I know all my diligent study in The Bible is helping my future

the knowledge of the Word of God. It is utmost in my life now. It seems when I let go of my devotionals, and I take control. I deeply recede into this fountain of slushy muck. I start reading and writing a lot of vocabulary in the Bible.

When I think of my children, I remember how everything was broken, and I could not put any pieces together. So then I place them in the Trust of God and the ex’s quest to be other than a deadbeat Dad, as he so always said, last three or four years.

All the things

    He was not to the children he has to be now, and sometimes I think he is not going to be able to do it. He realizes all the responsibility for it not just financial. I hope he is strong enough. See I do not wish harm on him, he is not that strong. Children needed their Dad they never had. I hope he is that man and dad he wanted to be. You know there is a negative side to this, I hope he is being all he can be, Importantly not letting our children down. Cause Mom doesn’t have anything. I am handling it.

    It is quite late. I am glad I got to talk to you. Thank you for your insight, and inspirations, you have blessed me with a real understanding that I have needed desperately for years. My growth is not limited, and is exceeding in the right progression, for what I have been through.

    I wish not to leave my children out of this, but I can only do something for me for their benefit tomorrow. I am building a tower of precious jewels positive thinking, etc. All resources are being tapped in. I believe the spirit is working preparing the way for me to help benefit others, use my knowledge, etc. to help people in my condition, “World Condition.”

I have faith in all God’s Words Past, Present, Future; we

can only get there one day at a time. A lot of my writing is different don’t you think. May the grace of God adorn you in all your works through Jesus Christ Our Lord and Bless You Complete. June 3, 1996

OVER AGAIN

    If I had it all to do over again. I would have listened to my Lord because I heard him. I was part of a circle that needed to come to an end of the cycle. Thank you, Lord. June 7, 1996

    God is the foundation that gives us life. Man is dominant only in his stupidity; alcohol destroys Families. “Write God’s words to begin to end, what exactly He and only he says, through the from The Holy Spirit through Christ Our Lord Amen.” “but know got caught up in the moment,” “make them look.” June 8, 1996

    Reading and writing, knowledge is limitless. The Bible is past present, future. Omnipresent since it’s writings. The heart searches for it’s home all it’s born day. The heart is the home of the highest. The soul, choose to live, and you will have everlasting life. Through Jesus Christ Our Lord.

    Six mountains to climb the seventh you rest with and through Jesus Christ. While the sheathing of the old ways,  memories with pain, the sins you have in yourself, and those that have affected your life adversely. The new seeds are planted through the regeneration of The Truth, we all have, inside us. June 10, 1996

    I have ups and downs. I know we all do. I know all my diligent study in The Bible is helping my future. The regeneration is regenerating itself through the energy that is Jesus Christ Holy Spirit. I can see it around me. June 13, 1996

    Solitary Have not been sleeping, restless, lonely probably, no dwelling of my own, no escape, no fantasy, dealing with reality. I am using my time wisely not bee idle in mind. I needed a lot of knowledge to get through this spiritual awakening solitary. Me and the Spirit of Our Heavenly Father.

I have not wasted this last six months at all.

    Painful, but I have an inside understanding of the degeneration that has haunted man in our sphere of time and reason. It took giving up sole possessor of everything, even my stuff, left with nothing. Two months later I got my maiden name back.

    I fought through hell to come back to some forgiveness of myself reasons, situations, circumstances. I have to get out in public but all my time, in the research of God’s word I have run across quicksand. No one believes you accept my guardian angel. Quick to judge, sure to condemn.

    Whose condemnation is it? Not mine, your time will come, my time was just sooner. Believe what you may, All the words written in The Bible are yesterday, today, is tomorrow.

    Past, Present, Future, God’s gift is the present sheath the past through Jesus Christ Holy Spirit and look forward to the future. For it is only through Jesus Christ that we can be forgiven, He is the opening of our souls. Then the Baptism the death of sin, rebirth through and with Jesus Christ the redemption of our sins the cleansing sometimes continues you do not think you can take another development and a bigger one comes around. June 14, 1996

Perceive

Now, I can perceive. Before, when I was in the muck of destruction, I could not think. Now I have an unlimited span in my mind’s eye. There stands firm in my being. June 16, 1996,

    Confused: I am confused about my spiritual awareness, the knowledge is there, it is all in my writings, my keepsakes, which are essential to me. I know the meaning of truth. I can write it, but I can not speak it.

     June 17, 1996, In the past five and a half months, I have been reading God’s Words, studying daily for hours. I have written prayers, letters, vocabulary, set a definite consciousness of the presence of God, which I felt I could not reach. All the things that need to be done will be done in perfect order in perfect time. June 17, 1996, Wendy Yvette Greenwell

© 1996-2023 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell

2008

WENDY WITH JESUS

Wendy with Jesus, {the Holy Spirit,} “In Presence of Spirit,” in writing to The World.

Night Photo, with a flash
Wendy with Jesus In Presence of Spirit in writing to The World

Make no doubt about it, The Lord hath called His People home, them that can hear let them come unto God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit.

I leave all the plans in Your Hands, Lord because I cannot see it in mine. I know first hand how essential these writings are to the Lord and I. I insist on completing it. So People will be soothed, and regenerate internally to external purification.

All in all, it is a significant passage for everyone, not just myself.

    We are one in Spirit. I can with the whole will of My Father who ordained me, Wendy, to write Our Book for anyone who needs to recuperate, and find their way to the Presence of Spirit, in every heart, “In the Kingdom, the Holy Will Is Done.”

To Jesus Christ,

“but what oneself is to You Dear Lord, what you have given me, my love, and my life, to fulfill the plan You have made for every person on this planet we call earth. 1988 “IN PRESENCE OF SPIRIT.” Oh Lord, I give to You, “I am, In Presence of Spirit in Conversations with the Lord.”  June 12, 2008,

Oh, Jesus, we need so much.

    We need Your Presence To Fill Us, Renew Us, Regenerate Us. Fill Our Ever Presence with Your Eternal Presence, and Bring Us Where You Want Us To Be. Hold fast Your Love, Your People are searching, and not finding You, they can not hear You. Lord Open Up, and Send The Sound Waves so they can listen to you. August 9, 2008

Well, I have done some inputting and quite a bit of reading.

    I have written several writings in the last few weeks. 2008 is already over 17,000 words by itself. If I did not have this book to work on all these years since the day I left I would not have made it.

“Go into the “I,” of You, and talk To the Lord

    In the privacy of your mind, and your soul receives the messages that are waiting to be set free inside your private house. Talk to Jesus. Tell him your innermost thoughts. Confess what you need to so He can help cleanse you in the blood of Jesus Christ.

    Now would be a good time to read John 17 The Whole Chapter. Jesus Christ Prayer to God. Read Romans and Hebrews, and Corinthians read. Ask Jesus Christ to help you through this hard time in your life. Give Him you, confide in Him, ask Him for guidance, understanding. Give it to God. December 24, 2008, Wendy Yvette Greenwell

© 2008-2023 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell

1996

I HAVE REGRESSED

I have regressed a bit, but I am in reality.

Shadow on My Trees
My fantasy only saved me when everything was crashing down

It was a tough week, previous. I need to strive totally for my independence, and I am satisfied with all the Divorce, for now, later it will be a completely different story.

 

All the years were a struggle.

    I am not happy with what I put up with, the way I reacted to him, the way the children were’ in the middle of our hatred. It should not have happened. I cannot blame anyone but myself, for being so vulnerable to lies, deceit, confusion, rudeness, unfaithfulness.

My fantasy only saved me when everything was crashing down

And my husband then was suffering from his sufferings, and he was not able to talk about it. There is a big difference between honesty and deceit. I do not hate him; I do not love him either. I would rather be by myself then to subject myself to another man’s rules and regulations, his power, and control, to put down my existence. I feel like I am twelve what regression. It is not easy, but I know significant changes are going to be happening.

I do love, it here in San Antonio,

I was tired of The Valley to many memories. Not good at forgetting all my trauma’s right now. I know there are worse things that could have happened. I am such an outcast, not a people person, my esteem I have zero, I have to pick myself up.

How could I be so coy,

Oh God, I have let myself suffer so much, and I could not do anything about the outcome. I always wanted him to be more of a part of the children’s life. I will never feel sorry for her or be happy for her, I have given her to much emotion, and she has my family.

    I lost my husband because of her and his not being able to forgive himself for the awful years he was so cruel to me. He wanted to do it right, it to me is not fair, but I do hope he gets there even if it is with her.

    He said it took six years to get over me holding a grudge because I told him I had a crush on my third pregnancy Dr. who I had confided all that I had succumbed to all the abuse, those six years most important part of our children growing up. He was cruel and suave, neglected everything except his career, I had no other choice than to put up, and this is what I got. It is going to get better, and at this point, it is all I can handle.

It is Sunday, I read the Bible, and I feel some relief.

This has been a hard week also. Important crucial to the addicted person state and confusion and or being addicted to the addicted person. April 22, 1996, Wendy Yvette Greenwell

    March 12, 2018, My Dad wants us, my twin and I do see him today. He is 85 now, and he has some issues going on that he is worried about. We are an hour and a half away from where he lives. My sister fell and hurt herself on the rib cage, so I am driving. It has been some time since I have driven to the Arroyo.

Her husband is staying with Richard and my dog and their dog that is 18 blind and can not hear, it is so sad, but she is still trucking around.

    I know I am going back to 1996, it is all meant to go together. So it does not matter what year I pick on. I am on a roll. This is the 50th day that I have Published, and I feel I need to continue. No matter how uncomfortable I am at times.

   The first six months was cleaning out the cobwebs so to speak. So with all of this, I am going to keep this on here, and Publish. The Picture is dark, but I do not care. It is Fabulous, I have never taken a picture of my trees with a shadow before, so it is exceptional. Take care; God Bless The World and Everyone On It. Are you ready, I can not believe myself sometimes. I have to Publish it. February 9, 2019, Wendy

© 1996-2023 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell

1996

WRITING IS PERSONABLE

Thank you for helping me through the hardest time of my life.

Moon Photo
Thank you for helping through the hardest time of my life

Writing is just much more personable. I am a little impatient.

I have been writing a lot, knowledge of the understanding of the Bible. I am thankful for my twin the anger I once had is gone from God. He fixes what needs to be fixed.

    In The Bible, we need to read it in the present tense. You are a master involved in so many outlets helping people with knowledge.

    The understanding of different aspects of the whole realm of your studies in your discipleship. I hope with the studying of the Books of The Bible that one day I will be able to give at least a fourth of what you have provided in your lifetime. I look like a failure at marriage and children in life ha!

    But now tense I am where God wants me to be. I am growing inward which will be more fruitful tomorrow.

    A lifetime of negative has to replace itself with the truth of our existence. There has to be more, and there is. I will get passed this and hopefully be able to push my way out into the World. May 29, 1996

    March 11, 2018, To my 72-year-old friend, guardian angel, I used to call her. I am second guessing myself. Should I, Could I, Would I, Shall I, Yes I think I will. February 9, 2019, Wendy

© 1996-2023 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell

2008

DIFFERENCE



See there is a difference in our letters, and my writings.

Moon between My Trees
See there is a difference in our letters and my writings

His are to his first family, well our family, and they are significant to the fulfillment of “In Presence of Spirit,” as a whole developmental process from beginning to end.

The first book is the credentials

that I had done at the time; it was in no way complete. So I am sitting here with 330 books that are complete in regard, it is a book of its own.

It has been read by the family on my mom’s side only.

    I have the rest of everything I wrote, and that makes it three books in one. But what? There are three more years of writing after “Reflections of In Presence of Spirit,” that I did not realize until 2008. So I guess that makes it, more parts of the whole.

So with all this,

I am going to merge his letters with my writings a unique combination of flesh versus spirit, in this remarkable journey we have been on. I unite my writings  2005 with that of the letters the husband of my youth wrote the children and me, and I share them with anyone who wants to read it. I assure you, you will not get bored. “I decided long ago to leave his letters out; I gave him credit where no credit was do, honestly. I need to Publish for Publishing’s sake right now.”

It is from the Spirit of Christ, and he joined us,

as one in Spirit, because we never got here when we were’ married.

This love for him is better in Spirit,

So we may never again be entwined in the flesh, we are and will always be in the Spirit of “In Presence of Spirit in Conversations with the Lord, and of course, “Reflections of In Presence of Spirit,” in which we share in our commitment and our communications with each other, our love and understanding of the knowledge that is given through Jesus Christ our Savior, the only ruler of our souls. March 22, 2008, Wendy Yvette Greenwell, I am going to have to Publish as is because I can not change it, and I am running out of time.

© 2008-2022 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell

2010

SO WHAT!

In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

Moon Light
So what am I supposed to do

“As it was, in the beginning, is now and ever shall be the world without end.”

So what am I suppose to do? The Book says to be positive and affirm positive attributes and dedicate yourself to your conviction, and I have. Time, and time again. Through out the length of my writing days, and then some. I acknowledge that you have given me the greatest gift being, in presence of spirit with you in all my writings. January 14, 2010

Laser Tomorrow

Mr. Errol Grannum will be performing drilling a hole in my left eye and the will re-open the hole in my right eye. The ones that made this happen are Knights Templar out of Illinois. Thank you. They are paying for my surgery on my left eye, and since my Dad and His Wife paid in cash the first surgery and preliminary Doctor’s appointment, he is going to open the hole in my right eye.

    It is a stressful time for me on the 27th I go before the Social Security Disability Judge, my third appeal. I have not had very many Doctor appointments because I do not qualify for any help because once again I am a pauper because I quit June 2007 because I was suffering from my eyes and yes forever thought they were’ eye migraines, turning out to be Narrow-Angle Glaucoma, with Cataracts that are not bad enough to take out.

    I am not even eligible to get the help of any kind from the commissions for the Blind. Now if I were going to go back to work, they would help me. I figure I will go to them if I get denied again.

My brother is coming down from California

for my Twin and My 50th Birthday. Weird how swift time flies.

You see back in early 1996 I wrote a piece,

    I asked the Lord for a friend, not a husband, Ha. There is a difference. He gave Richard and me our friendship. We have lived in this comfortable House for eight years. When I worked, I paid for my part. But since I have not worked in two years and seven months, he has taken care of all of it. It is only Him, my Son and me now. The girls have since seven months moved out.

    Although I care for Richard with his needs, he has provided. Home for me. We remain friends, and of course, we are companions, we even share a room, but it does not mean we are common law married. “He is 75 now. Cerebral Palsy has taken its toll on him. I am thankful that God gave me the ability to care for him day in day out, although we like the nights I hate the Sun, the heat of South Texas.” Jesus Christ thank you for Richard, my best friend. Only a friend. I am worried, and no one will still help.

    Oh Lord in your name I do pray.  I am so confused about what I am supposed to do. I need your help in all areas of my life, my love, my book, the complete book. The Surgery on my eyes tomorrow, The court in front of the Judge for Disability with my Lawyer at least I will not be alone.

I have been reading 2005 writings

“Reflections of In Presence of Spirit.” To the husband of my youth, from the wife of his youth. It is beautiful that is when I had my first glaucoma attack. I am already on page 59. He still has not read it But my reading and editing further a feeling the vibration of such power prayers to the husband of my youth that is over one hundred pages and 29,000 plus a word count. Second to the highest words from all the years of writing.

    It is for anyone, not just him. Truly it is verified. Hopefully, prayerfully you can find forgiveness in your heart, mind, and soul, it takes a ton of layers of your past and gives you the room to breathe through the cleansing of your hearts pain.

I know it works because that gut pain has not come back.

    Even in extreme difficulties, to describe mine to the minute status. How else could I state that? I have choice minutes of anxiety depression, fear, I do not have the means and resources I need. Still, no transportation. January 21, 2010

I know I have been working on the writings, no one else was going to do it.

    I told my Lawyer it is my hobby, Ha, it is a lot more than that, but because, “In Presence of Spirit,” only sold one book. There is no money involved it has nothing to do with my Court. I worked for The Lord and He will provide in His time. This, all this, is not, for greed it is to help, in the regeneration of our souls. Seriously I followed through with what I was given in Spirit to do. Even in my Mortality with my own problems and the way I am. The Holy Spirit of Jesus Christ blessed me with His Presence of Spirit.

    Thank you, Jesus Christ, there is no way I would have made it through without you and our “You are and I am In Presence of Spirit in Conversations with the Lord.” “Knowledge had but impatiently been misplaced”

    I knew that was the beginning of my book. I was going to be writing while I worked on it on the side. I was still writing every word that would one day be my complete, to be certified Book, of the offspring of my first, in writing communication, “In Presence of Spirit.”

      Jesus Christ heard my prayers and answered it at the beginning of my soul’s voyage in search of peace in my soul. Now we know it is not all about me. It is for anyone who is searching and not finding. It is for you and for me. I still do not speak about all this, I have no questions to answer. My eyes feel better today. January 28, 2010, Wendy Yvette Greenwell

©2010-2023 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell

1996

THROUGH ALL THIS PAIN

1 Corinthians 7:30-31

Just Clouds
With all my Spirit I will not lose track

    “And they that weep, as though they wept not, and they that rejoice, as they that rejoiced not 31. And they that use this world, as not abusing it, for the fashion of the world passeth away.

    Romans 11:8 According as it is written, God hath given them the spirit of slumber, eyes that should not see, and ears, that they should not hear; unto this day. For if the casting away of them be the reconciling of the World, what shall the receiving of them be, but life from the dead

THROUGH ALL THIS PAIN

    Letter: Through all this pain and suffering also for my children. I am not a disgrace to God. For it is with him I live, move, and have my being. I am waiting for the Lord for His Justification because through the Judge; God set me free from bondage to well, “Internal House Cleaning.”

I am working on the Bible, and with all my Spirit I will not lose track.

    We need to work on “regeneration.” See I have shed some layers of the afflictions that were’ put upon me. Long generations of time past are surfacing in time and reason.

    Abuse in the physical, mental, emotional, verbal, spiritual, alcoholism past down generation to generation. How Long? A long time, covetous, possessiveness, control, rage, shame, blame, jealousy, should I go on, we know we can go to the Bible and find the reason. “It keeps regenerating itself until destruction.”

For my Dears, not man’s will but, “God’s will be done,” any way round about.

    Reading Chapters of Scripture in Church, a must, show the World how much security you have in bringing in more than you can hold.

   2 Corinthians 6:1-18, 7:1-16. When you read scripture, you read a chapter. God’s words flow through the writings, you know that. Man’s way is not right with God. For all have come short of The Glory of God, but what can one Church do? What can one couple of Ministers do? You can make known God’s way complete.

    2 Corinthians 4:4 (For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds;) 5. Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.

    Corinthians 12:9 “My grace is sufficient for thee, for my strength is made perfect in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

See when I told you I was prophesying. I was.

    It is for The Glory of God. Christ my Salvation, My Baptism, my reaffirmation, I got Delivered on 2/9/1996. The prophecy I carry is “God’s Words.” Who knows what miracles he has planned for his chosen and I know I am one. I am a baby in Christ, and I have always known in my heart there is a God, and I walked willingly through the fire of my soul.

I had no one but the burning coals of his search for disaster, greed, materialism, adultery,

     I was safe in my mind. God brought me through, and he has to do everything. Everyone is watching him. He likes attention.

    See God does not need an interpreter because every word that is written is “God’s Word.” For all generations. We are the regeneration of God’s Word, what He said, has come to pass, is right now, and He needs, the mass multitudes because He is alive, and calling the chosen to come together, so we can be home. Finally after all generations. For our soul’s search has intertwined with all the generations of God. March 17, 1996, Wendy Yvette Greenwell

© 1996-2023 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell

2017

EGO BASED

Yeah, good name.

Special Night Photo
I could not have made it through all these years without my times, “In Presence of Spirit,” with The Holy Spirit of The Lord.

    A person wrote that my inpresenceofspirit.com is from my ego. Her ego is getting convicted. That is why she cannot fathom the depths of my life’s misery from without to within, “In Presence of Spirit.” Ego has nothing to do with it, period end of the story.

    I have thrown out there hundreds of writings, from both my sites. I do not call the forgiveness of sins and who is responsible for me to write in the way I did, I have, and I am. It is in the I of me that is “In Presence of Spirit,” with The Holy Spirit of The Lord. I tell all of you, I could not have made it through all these years without my times, “In Presence of Spirit,” with The Holy Spirit of The Lord. Repeat on that one.

    My private conversations with The Lord has been out there since September 2011. I threw it out there all messed up, and I had to put it all together again. May 6, 2017

I have been shouting out to the World my writings since September 2011.

    Too bad, I deleted everything on Facebook. I went for it because I had to tell my first love before I could figure out how I was going to say it to The World about, “In Presence of Spirit,” and the extensions.

    I am content with not having any substantial personal comments about my writings in General. I ran across one on the web where my writings are some of them anyway a woman wrote, “that all of it comes from my ego.” I do not see that. There was nothing left of me when I sunk into my inner chamber and accepted in complete totality, The Savior’s gift to me. Forgiveness of sins and the inheritance of His Gift to me, a sinner in bondage, straightway from my hell into His Heaven.

The Spirit of The Lord lifted me out of darkness into the light of His Ever-presence.

    In One with God The Father, God The Son, God The Holy Spirit. The instant I accepted him into my innermost being, He sparked the light lets of His Divine Promise to me broken from bondage to prepare a way for me to write all our times, “In Presence of Spirit.”

    That they are, I was not having conversations with myself. I am having conversations with The Lord. Since the beginning. I knew one day I would share them with the World. It is for the Spirit of The Lord’s purpose that I continue to share my writings.

    I am not in good shape. I have several issues, what is the use? Close it up. Who cares. So I have begun my manuscript. I have kept myself from mourning my 2007 HP Pavilion and all its contents. I still have the pictures on the sites.

For years, my ex-husband would pop up.

    He came to see the growing family, visit, stay the night. Not with me on the couch. Then one night in July 2016 he shows up for an all-niter. He saw the six people who were living here then; he visited with Richard then he found me outside in the backyard, with my plants and trees.

    The first thing that comes out of his mouth was, “Have you ever been in love.” “My reaction, I laughed and said yes with my illusion.” Boy, that opened up a nine-hour conversation. Which caused me a bad break out of Rosacea and Glaucoma attack and I missed my Eye Specialist appointment that day.

    In the end, he wanted a hug, well Lexie the German Shepard stood up and tried to bite him, on the face, if he had not reacted as he did, hand up protecting his face and hand in the dog’s mouth. He would have been bitten. He says oh I have one more beer you want to talk some more I said no and went in, agony.

I felt relieved though.

    On the other hand, the truth set him free from me. Scratch his truth about our marriage. He claimed he loved me and would take care of me. It all became the lie that lost itself in the day to day not marrying your one true love.

    I felt I did not deserve him because I was tainted and I would never be worthy. But this guy smoothed talked his way to marrying me fast. We made a pact he would take care of me, and I would not cheat on him. I did not want to stay with my parents. I was in no condition to work.

Since July 2016 I have only seen him five times.

    We do not talk on the phone anymore. He is a truck driver like our Son. He asked me one time, “do you worry about me?” I said no that’s not my job. My Son had to pick an 18 Wheeler job cross country, across the United States back down, then up again every 36 hours. I hate it. I have to put you in the Lord’s hands Son. Drive Careful. He loves it.

    My oldest daughter is expecting her sixth child. That makes the total seventeen grandchildren one in heaven. We never got to be Grandparents together. That is sad in a way. I miss him. There is just nothing left for us, to say to each other.

    It really is a good thing. He made his choice the day he left our family, never to return to once was. Thank You, Lord. I am happy to be free, not chained and gagged.

    I have written pages that I can Publish. Will I? Can I? Could I? Should I? We will see. Thank You, Lord, for all our times, “In Presence of Spirit.com” Short ones, long ones, all of them the whole bunch of our writings in, “You are, and I am In Presence of Spirit in Conversations with the Lord.” May 8, 2017, Wendy Yvette Greenwell

© 2017-2023 inpresenceofspirit.com Wendy Yvette Greenwell